Trying to find someone at my own level on the internet is like searching for food in a garbage dump where there is not even a single crumb.

 Trying to find someone at my own level on the internet is like searching for food in a garbage dump where there is not even a single crumb.

― Atrona Grizel

Finding someone like myself, no matter how much I long for it, would not be gentle, because it would threaten to shake the unshakable conviction to which my identity is tied: “I am utterly different.”

― Atrona Grizel

Thought is not a commodity given to others and taken from others as if it were money. Everyone’s thought is their own. The reality of others should be optional, but a person’s own reality should be compulsory.

― Atrona Grizel

God is the shortest path to which the limited human mind, panicking in the face of the universe’s inconceivability, strays.

― Atrona Grizel

Even if I threw myself outside, there would never be anyone to talk to. Not because no one is there or because I can’t communicate, but because no one sees what I see. To communicate, it is almost a necessity that I abandon my views, but I would prefer to remain alone for an entire lifetime rather than abandon myself even for a minute. This does not reveal that I am “strange” but that everyone is the same; yet people consider this sameness “good” and mistake it for difference. What kind of disgrace is this?

― Atrona Grizel

Mainstream youth organizations generally encourage making what is already flawed even more flawed: wanting to turn structurally inexperienced and incapable youth into authorities on “serious” matters.

― Atrona Grizel

While childhood relationships are made up of what is spoken, adulthood relationships are made up of what is left unsaid.

― Atrona Grizel

All my suffocations mainly come from being stuck among people. If I were living my individual paradise in a reclusive forest, why would I care about anything human at all?

― Atrona Grizel

The National Socialists distorted Nietzsche’s ideas, and the West, mistaking these distortions for his true philosophy, adopted them as such. His thought has no connection whatsoever with notions like “the domination of the strong” or “the survival of the fittest.” Yet today there is an entire generation that builds its identity around a culture that embraces Nietzsche only for what it perceives as his “dark side,” never truly grasping what he meant—or did not mean—at a deeper level. It is telling how much troubled, volatile people fetishize him, for Nietzsche cherished freedom so fervently that he brought it dangerously close to the edge. These aggressive and reactive individuals latch onto this aspect of his thought like mucus, clinging to it and corrupting it as they feed upon it. That is why, when I tell a typical modern young person that I admire Nietzsche, I fully expect to be seen merely as “radically angry and dangerous.” And that is also why I never speak of this admiration to them at all—because when I speak of the Übermensch, of egoism, subjectivism, and individualism, they understand it as discrimination, war, and blasphemy. They mistake the culture surrounding him for Nietzsche’s own philosophy, yet Nietzsche’s sole culture was culturelessness itself. And perhaps this is the inevitable cost of such profound transcendence: not the absence of understanding, but the presence of misunderstanding.

― Atrona Grizel

If a person complains of “not being able to find something to write,” it is because the pen has become a burden, and in everything they write, they are haunted by the fear of “productivity.” They force inspiration upon themselves, for they desire the very urge to write to arise. Yet the one who forces themselves to write is condemned to a staring contest with the page.

― Atrona Grizel

The way Westerners draw borders: a map and a ruler…

― Atrona Grizel

The one who writes only when they feel like it, and refrains when they do not, can have nothing of real worth to say. Writing must be an obsession if what is written is to be worth reading.

― Atrona Grizel

Obsessions are passions that have lost their sense of attachment, belonging, and loyalty.

― Atrona Grizel

The deepest artists are those who conceive entire universes within their minds yet find no suitable means to project them outward.

― Atrona Grizel

A person who offers a list of “reasons to live” is, in fact, offering nothing new.

― Atrona Grizel

An innocent person is an ignorant person.

― Atrona Grizel

I used to wonder how people managed not to scream incessantly and wreak havoc. I still find it strange. That desire, after all, is always there.

― Atrona Grizel

Whoever speaks by saying “we” is a thief of reality.

― Atrona Grizel

The most terrifying person, as I feel, is the one who remains “unresponsive” in every situation.

― Atrona Grizel

Memories and works: the chains that bind a person to the earth.

― Atrona Grizel

The only way to be understood is to use ordinary language. Even if the minority can speak the language of the majority, the majority will never understand the language of the minority.

― Atrona Grizel

A person’s educational life begins only after the mental purging of all schools.

― Atrona Grizel

The existence of death makes life a temporary illusion—but a pleasant one, precisely because it’s a deception.

― Atrona Grizel

As the number of living beings increases, the value of life decreases.

― Atrona Grizel

“Human nature”: a “soft” expression fabricated by dependent and homogeneous minds, enslaved to their instincts and steered by their codes, in order to “legitimize” themselves.

― Atrona Grizel

With noise in the day, with sleep in the night: life is the endless escape of people from everything that might, even for a moment, remind them of themselves.

― Atrona Grizel

When I don’t write “Will you be my friend?”, none of them come near me. Unless I tell them to turn the doorknob and pull it toward themselves to open it, they won’t even touch that door at all. But when I do write “Will you be my friend?” and they come close, then I don’t want those who can fall into such a trap or be captivated by such superficiality. All forms of open invitation themselves risk attracting the very kind of interaction I disdain. So what will happen? An endless seclusion.

― Atrona Grizel

As the inner power of a soul increases, the humanity of it diminishes.

― Atrona Grizel

No one ever stopped, not even for a fleeting moment, to ask me—while pointing to the world—“Why are you here?” No one had the chance to even breathe. Like everyone else, I was dragged ceaselessly from one place to another. They kept my mind perpetually occupied. I could not think; I only acted, merely to salvage the moment. Perhaps I repeated this thousands of times. Even I could not grasp what was happening. I would close my eyes; suddenly I found myself transported elsewhere, in another place. Like a massive passenger ship, I was not steering it. I had been crammed inside merely as a passenger, and thus, wherever the captain directed it, I was forced to arrive there as well. And still, within me, I carried the unfulfilled weight of that question. I was not searching for a reason. I was merely waiting—for someone else to affirm that, out of thousands of planets, millions of galaxies, and perhaps billions of universes, I happened to be born into this one possibility—thus granting my existence some semblance of fragile reality.

― Atrona Grizel

To mature is to disappear.

― Atrona Grizel

After getting swallowed by the world by dealing with all my practical obligations—”responsibilities”—I take a deep breath and slip under the blanket at the end of the day. Not to anesthetize myself with screens—watching movies or playing games—but to give my mind its oxygen that costs nothing yet gifts everything: daydreaming.

― Atrona Grizel

To those sensitive to patterns, everything appears mechanical, because beneath everything lies a kind of loop.

― Atrona Grizel

Evil is everything done for the good, and vice versa.

― Atrona Grizel

Being on one’s own path can be understood by the gradual disappearance of those around the person.

― Atrona Grizel

Honesty does not create or nurture friendship; it kills it. The most honest person is the most solitary one.

― Atrona Grizel