Evil committed by free will is nobler than good done by imitating others.

 Evil committed by free will is nobler than good done by imitating others.

― Atrona Grizel

Genius reveals itself not in mathematics but in art. Anyone with a strong memory and good rote-learning ability can turn mathematics into an area of expertise, but art demands more than that: innovation. Mathematics explains; art explains why something is explained, or in what manner it is explained. Mathematics is objective and rests on proof, whereas art rests on discarding all possible “proofs,” refusing to worship the external universe, and instead constructing a private inner universe and aestheticizing it. You cannot truly “analyze” a poem or produce a “thesis” on a painting, because what a mathematical or scientific mind will see in a poem are syllable counts or sentence ratios, and in a painting the placement of emphases or the structural prototype of the depicted space. In other words, they will see neither the poem nor the painting. Because a mathematician’s mind cannot accommodate this, which is why creativity often conflicts with mathematics: mathematics itself means rules, and where rules dominate, there is neither thought nor feeling but memorization and repetition. This is what it means to possess a scientific mind: an obsession with “evidence” and an inability to function without systems. Science is spiritually barren because it does not step outside space and context, because it accepts only these; mathematics is included in this barrenness. Art, by contrast, exists to turn everything upside down, and so, it cannot be scientific.

― Atrona Grizel

What is often called “scientific philosophy” treats thinking as something that must be systematized, stabilized, and made administrable. Systematic philosophies tend to share this structural impulse. In such frameworks, what emerges is frequently not philosophy itself but doctrines that are easily transmitted, taught, and enforced within institutions. Because these philosophies are usually preoccupied with society as an object to be organized or explained, they often end up impoverished in terms of genuine thought. Nietzsche, whose philosophy is intentionally chaotic, still carries a pedagogical and prophetic style and is therefore naive in a certain sense, because he continues to speak toward humanity, to imagine “students,” and to remain preoccupied with “disciples,” even though the non-systemic depth is undeniably there. By contrast, “school fetishists” such as Kant and Hegel, whose philosophies rest on rigid theoretical foundations, function like machines, and machines can only generate noise. In my own thinking, I deliberately allow contradictions and break ideas into fragments, because I do not want a closed totality to form. None of my thoughts are directed toward societal institutions, and therefore they are not intended for public use. If they were, they would risk becoming instruments of coercion, leading to the destruction of societies through “elitist genocide” and turning remaining individuals into mutually alien, closed universes.

― Atrona Grizel

Teenagers’ interest in philosophy is, at its core, about forming connections with others. It is an apparatus, nothing more. At best, they express ideas in order to appear deep and to sell that supposed depth socially, turning it into popularity, because they do not yet possess individual thought. What they have instead are elevated hormones and impulses, animals seeking peer approval. And as long as hormones and impulses dominate, what exists is not thought but the advertisement of thought. Their encounter with philosophy does not happen quietly through solitary reading, but usually by watching nihilism debates on the internet, because what they have is not even a serious interest. For a young person, everything except connection is secondary, and naturally they can change their identities like mixing a soup, constantly experimenting with new “styles of thought.” This shows that what they are doing is thinking for the outside world, which is to say, not thinking at all.

― Atrona Grizel

Granting people who understand nothing about thought the right to complain about thoughts, in other words allowing those who do not think to interfere with those who do, for example by censoring ideas expressed by a thinking person on the grounds that they are “too dark” in the eyes of non-thinkers, will always result in the suspension of thought. Not everyone should have the right to express thoughts, because not everyone actually possesses thoughts; masses only have reactive opinions.

― Atrona Grizel
It is hardly possible for someone outside of culture to be understood by a psychologist, because the psychologist, by the very nature of the profession, must be social and therefore almost always exists within culture. Even when facing someone outside society, the psychologist will continue to perceive them through terms that belong to society. If the psychologist were themselves outside of culture, they would not even be a psychologist. This means that there is no such “social service” available for chronically alienated souls who carry the noise and superficiality of society on them all day long. They will simply be alone. The only thing they can do is to change the definition of solitude.

― Atrona Grizel

My indifference to other people’s thoughts is not innate; it comes from having once cared about them far too much and having paid the price for it. And the truth is that I am still not inwardly indifferent. Someone who does not care about society does not write hundreds of pages about it.

― Atrona Grizel

The only respect I can have for my classmates is that, at most, we are inmates of the same prison. I have escaped this prison intellectually, but they choose to numb themselves and try to force me into being physically imprisoned like them. I do not comply, of course, but the cost is carrying the fatigue of a warrior: weekdays are the battlefield, and weekends are a temporary rest granted only to return to that battlefield. All of this ultimately stems from the fact that the building itself is a sensory prison. At school, after “exams are coming,” the second most frequently heard sentence was always “I’m bored,” because there is truly nothing enjoyable there. As a result, they are forced to manufacture entertainment just to endure it: throwing erasers, popping bottles, flying paper airplanes, and even fights, all merely to add a trace of pleasure to that grayness. Stuffing young people into such a confined space and expecting them to sit quietly there all day is psychological torture.

― Atrona Grizel

Religions, myths, and ideologies all fear darkness, because darkness reminds them of their true face. That is why they declare themselves “knights of light”: light is useful to them. The easiest and most reliable way to deceive ordinary people is simply to promise them eternal happiness, and many will genuinely believe this lie if it is presented well, because the ordinary person lacks the capacity to think independently. Yet behind everything that openly laughs and shines, one should look for cunning and deceit. At best, these are ornaments; at worst, traps. In any case, they are not what they claim to be. They are masks. Solemnity and severity do not arise from excess; they carry a tension that restrains excess without eliminating it: neither fully bright nor fully dark, but a light that feels strangely “dark,” and a darkness that intuitively carries a magical and mystical atmosphere. This is aesthetic liminality, and the deepest art is always found at thresholds, never in questions or answers alone.

― Atrona Grizel

The videos people watch resemble the cartoon programs families put on for babies to keep them entertained: food-stuffing contests, salad-eating “battles,” “prank” videos, reaction faces, slime cutting, staged “generosity” giveaways, looping dances, lip-syncing, outfit styles, exaggerated “life hacks,” the “battle” between “masculine energy” and “feminine energy,” and street “interviews” filled with scripted stupidity. Humanity is evolutionarily regressing toward apedom. Young people’s identities are entirely in the hands of those big-shot “influencers” and trend-setters, because the only thing young people clearly care about is peer approval—and that means being willing to risk everything to be “popular.” The shortest path to this is to copy, word for word, the speech patterns and ways of thinking of people who are already famous, and to present this imitation to others almost as if it were a badge of belonging to a tribal clan. Even those who govern the country do not realize the state the country is in, because they see nothing wrong: they have never seen any other kind of youth. Throughout history, the only youth they have known has been this foolish and imbecilic one, and they do not even know that something beyond it is possible. Consequently, when they interact with young people, they believe they are engaging with real “youth” rather than with machines or animals; and, on top of that, under the pretext of “learning cultural differences and embracing generational differences,” they adopt the same slang and artificial, manufactured intonations used by the young, merely to appear more “approachable” to them. And if I were to say these things to them, they would claim that I am the childish one, because membership in the world they inhabit requires it; questioning is deemed “childish,” while they—the so-called “tough guys”—supposedly have their own “deep troubles.” This is a society that tries to shame me for questioning, because everything becomes a subject of humor and, as a result, nothing is taken seriously. Everyone is laughing. Laughter everywhere. All the time. Such a noble emotion should never have been cheapened this way. In a world like this, you cannot encourage thought. There is only one thing deep thinkers who refuse to trade clarity for comfort gain: social isolation. Endurance without any tangible reward. And… this is precisely why it is beautiful.

― Atrona Grizel

Social media shapes language in that way, and societies are so dependent on it and its trends that the word “autistic” ceases to be perceived as discriminatory or disrespectful and instead becomes a casually used term meant to be “funny,” treated as an ordinary joke.

― Atrona Grizel

I have seen weather that was excessively windy, and in such conditions I found myself gaining another ally, like rain and snow, that disrupts the human system. In this kind of weather, even vehicles sway, and some can overturn or be hurled aside. Humans, meanwhile, struggle to walk, trying to resist nature. If a tornado were to form and pull those tiny silhouettes into itself and swallow them, I would laugh hard while watching from where I stood. That tornado would understand my laughter. Only we would understand it.

― Atrona Grizel